Awkward conversations writer

Thoughts of a writer who doesn’t know what to say

I’m a writer, which means I write for a living. So why is it that sometimes I struggle to find my words? Perhaps I’m a writer of few words, or I just suck at conversations. Perhaps…

This is another post in this series of mine where I talk about some problems I struggle with, but not provide any solution because I haven’t really figured them out myself.

You definitely have someone like this in your life: Someone you can count on when you need an opinion or a reaction. Someone who always finds the words to describe what they’re feeling. Someone who can speak off the top of their minds, almost instantly.

And then there’s me.

hilary duff i don't know

WHY?!

My job requires me to have a good grasp of the English language, and to be able to use my words well. I also blog, and I love to use this platform to convey my thoughts and experiences. But putting my travel experiences into words is one of the things I struggle with. How do you find the best way to convey how you felt?

“So, how was it?”
“It was okay…”

My parents used to always ask me how my exams went, and the answer they (almost) always got was, “It was okay.” Not sure if that was the answer they wanted to hear… Well it could be worse?

Even now, if you would ask me how I liked the food at a particular restaurant, or if you asked if I liked an idea that was proposed, I find myself at a loss of words. I mean, unless I found it extremely horrible, or mind-blowing, all that comes to mind is along the lines of fine, okay, I guess… (HAHA that makes me seem like such a boring person to speak to.)

I mean, I don’t know what else to say???

mean girls oh i don't know

I’ve been getting better though! Over the years, I’ve done better with chatting up strangers (especially when I have to do interviews with them), and making random meaningless (am I wrong?) small talk. And I am varying my answers a lot more. Maybe it’s the Asian in me that’s preventing me from being more expressive hahaha. Maybe what I need to do is let loooooose~

“How was your weekend?”

Remember how I said I’m a homebody in the previous thought post? Yep, so it should be of no surprise that I absolutely dread it when someone asks me how my weekend went. I used to work at a place where my boss would ask me about my weekend. Every. Single. Monday.

My inner thoughts: *I think it was fine. But I did hang out with my friends, does it make it a great weekend? Do I say I had an awesome weekend? Is that overselling my weekend?!?!*

big bang theory panic attack

I suppose it’s a good conversation starter, or a recommended greeting on Mondays. But after saying I “didn’t do much” for a few weekends in a row, even I was bored of myself. Eventually I trained myself to vary my responses, but it still remains as one of my most dreaded questions.

love it or hate it

I suppose the problem comes from the fact that I don’t feel very strongly about things. There are people who can tell you they LOOOOOOVED the steak they had last night, and they can also say the same for the leading character in the latest blockbuster, or a hotel they stayed at. And they have a fair share of things they dislike as well.

I don’t feel that using such terms truly represent what I think, and if I do, it’s really rare. However, if you’re curious, there are some things I knowingly hate and love:

Hate list: Stomp, stupid people, …I’ll update this when I think of something else.
Love list: Rilakkuma, pretty stationery, stunning photography, the people close to me, travelling… etc.


Maybe it’s because I don’t project my feelings outwards?
Or because I haven’t had much practice with speaking my mind?
Maybe I don’t speak as freely as I think I do?

Then again, I didn’t begin writing this post with the intention of giving it a logical conclusion. If I knew, this would a self-help post on how not to be awkward in conversations.

frustrated kill me

Tell me, do you ever feel this way?!?!

With love,
jtwong


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